Ageing & Social Connections

Hi, there! 

Surely you wonder who I am ! Indeed, I wonder too at the distance I have put between me and this page - in years, not days or weeks. 

I suppose that dates me ! I am a senior citizen, and I tend to forget as the elderly are wont to do. That's not an excuse, but simply the way things are with me. My social horizon has shrunk and I like to spend time with myself rather than make the effort to reach out to others. I introspect.

In other words, I withdraw within myself. Because significant nodes on the social network have moved on, I'm averse to putting in the hard work to create new social connections.  

I stay safe in my little bubble. I suppose this leads to isolation and the gradual inability to interact with the unknown - places, people and things. My emotional mind doesn't want any more negativity. I'm sure the need to protect myself from eventual loss is understandable. 

That said, is that healthy? 

 

Rituals, rituals

Rituals, in all communities,  are important for the collective spiritual wellbeing. These bind the members together, reaffirming and reinforcing group identity.

The harvest festival, ongoing in many parts of India celebrates the creative powers of Nature in different forms. In Bengal, Ghot Puja (translation: worship of the pot) initiates the ritualistic process. 

The pot filled with water, with a vermilion figurine drawn on it, symbolizes the pregnant womb. The daab (green coconut), the amrapatra (5 mango leaves) placed at the mouth of the pot, flowers, represent Her organic proliferation. This worship of Goddess Durga, Mother Earth, has its roots in ancient Fertility practices. 

People also remember their ancestors during this period, in gratitude for their present existence, reiterating the continuity of familial generations, being and becoming. 

Rituals are meant to give meaning to life and living processes. But, not everybody in the community that follows a ritual believes in it. So, are rituals still important today? 

Does friendship mean to you what it means to me?

Happy Friendship Day!

So... what does #friendship mean?

I would say, 

A #relationship:

That affirms and confirms who I really am...

That sticks around to help me up when I am down, yet doesn't hesitate to call a spade a spade...

That mirrors my unspoken right back at me without malice or indulgence...

That knows without being told that were roles reversed, I would do the same...

Friendship is the state of #equality in #sharedpurpose. 

Your take?

RE-purpose purpose

My blog purpose, 14 years ago, was to reach people. I was, like, in the academic telling mode. I could reach only about a handful of folks...Heck, who likes to be told? 

I always found it awkward to speak about myself. In sharing, my feet were leaden, my spirit unwilling. I was the penguin teetering on the edge of the cliff, pushing others to share but unable to take the plunge myself. 

I realized that I needed a new reality. I took my own advice and embarked on a journey to transform. 

For things to change, 

You need to change.  

- Jim Rohn

This is my individual success story. I have laboured to be fitter, faster, stronger.  Now, I can repurpose as the real me replacing the disembodied persona. At worst, I get a bruised ego in interactions. And, at best, develop the emotional intelligence worthy of an empathetic Health & Fitness Coach. 

How older people can re-purpose

In traditional India, senior citizens are expected to become dependent upon other family members. But life inside a bubble can be stifling. It tells on their sociability, their mental wellbeing. Under lockdown have not we all found that out? Many elders like me, would like to remain useful to themselves and to others in the years of life remaining.

Starting something new, be it in a career or a fitness programme, can be terrifying when you are older. It seems safer not to step outside the comfort zone and explore. Like penguins. They are superb swimmers, yet they teeter on the edge of the cliff to keep from plunging into the icy, deep blue…The point is the first step out into the unknown is the hardest. And the most crucial.

 

At 60+, I thought to embark upon a new career. But, in attempting to suit action to thought, my feet felt as if they were made of lead. I felt as penguins peering over the edge do - spirit unwilling!

Truth to tell, it is hard to step beyond lifetime learning and experience. I smile when I come across folks that cannot imagine beyond “the way things were” for them at a certain point in time. There is no turning back. Indeed, the ego, the executor of our will, can become the stumbling block to going forward. The young welcome change, the elders abhor it.

The young are unaware of passing time, because their life stretches in front of them. In older age, one is overly conscious of it, and fill with anxiety when things do not fall into place quickly. Youth thrives on negativity; older people shy away from it.

The learning curve, in any avenue, has its own trajectory. It flatlines for a long, long time, then suddenly rears up. I had to unlearn many assumptions, to be ready for change. My mind needed to be clear of fears and distractions.

When we have been through a lifetime of challenges, we are scarred. But we are capable of facing up to adversity. Our soft skills - learning from others, implementing knowledge, active listening, collaboration - help us to adapt to situations. Our attitude can be as tenacious, as unwavering as before, if we keep on purposeful action. And trust that we will succeed again, achieve again, though differently. Older penguins don’t need to learn to swim again, they need new purpose to step off the cliff.

Even if the pathway appears to lead nowhere? “…the struggles along the way are only meant to shape you for your purpose,” exhorts “Black Panther” Chadwick Boseman, “As you commence to your paths, press on with pride and press on with purpose.”

Get started today. Plan to achieve a new level of Fitness. Or explore a new career in Health & Wellness, helping others to take care of themselves. Send me a message. I can help.

Jharna Sengupta Biswas, Health Coach

Fat content IS priority

Fitness has never been a priority in India. Why should it be now?

3 out of 4 people are overweight in this country. India follows USA and China on the obesity scale. 

“Fat content” is merely a parameter to evaluate body composition. But, the word “fat” is connotative, and many are sensitive to it. They minimize excess weight, or high blood pressure, or blood sugar as minor health issues that will not send them to hospital. They are fit and fine. 

Fact is Covid19 is a novel phenomenon, for which there are no vaccines. It is highly contagious and attacks underlying health conditions. That will send them to hospital. Nearly 6 million people around the world are infected; about four hundred thousand dead. 

Personal wellbeing must be a priority, medical experts reiterate in every country. Obese people are more vulnerable to the infection. Fat shaming is not the point here. Staying alive is. 

Rush to survive

In our country, we are conditioned to rush - to rush to work. to rush for provisions, to rush the queue, to rush onto oncoming traffic crossing the street...Essentially, to rush, rush, and rush. The frenetic pace has become second nature.

At the airport, you can spot the Indians a mile away. On any flight, they rush to be first onboard, and then, to be the first off the plane, pushing and shoving, jostling to occupy the exact same space. On the road, traffic hoots, honks, overtakes - stopped only by the signal lights turning red. Pedestrians play chicken with the traffic. When the lights turn green, they step off the sidewalk. A hand held aloft is expected to accord them right of way through onrushing traffic. 

It is inexplicable how contagious the conditioning is. Rationally, we may be shocked by the behaviour pattern. In a group, mindlessly, we all do precisely the same thing. Essentially, rush, rush and rush, without any sense of why or what for. Perhaps, we have learned through the ages, that we need to rush to survive. Else, oblivion may consume us!

The better option?

Culturally, we are afraid of stepping outside of comfort zones in Kolkata. We have become conditioned to it. Our trusting, welcoming attitude has led us to misery, grief, colonization and even slavery through generations. So we pendulum swing to the opposite direction. We mistrust everything. 

Fitness may be trending around the world. Not so in Kolkata. Despite the rise of lifestyle diseases like high blood pressure, obesity, diabetes around us, few wish to listen to reason. "No time, no time, very, very busy", many tell me, as they rush to get away. Ignorance, it seems, is bliss. Knowing means worrying, several say. Many, well aware of their unfit condition, hide their embarrassment behind ire. 

Ensconced in comfortable lifestyles, most people don't want their boat rocked. So what if they are a little bit overweight, a little bit diabetic and have a little bit of high blood pressure? Nothing has broken yet, so what is there to fix? A middle-aged man with a prominent midline spread claims he's very fit. The young mother piling on the pounds post-pregnancy, claims she already has too much to do. Thus, lifestyle diseases are left to fester as they will. Until medical assistance is unavoidable.

Generally, it is frustrating to campaign for social awareness of health and fitness in this scenario. Nevertheless, I notice a slight movement away from the stonewalling mindset - among the ageing population. They are tired, they say, of having to reach for meds to keep going. They like the idea of being healthy and active, medicine-free. Fitness fits their happy requirement!

Wellness only in the mind?

Nutritional advice has always seemed like blah, blah to me. I mean, we eat pretty well, right? That’s more than enough to meet nutritional requirements, surely. Besides, in common knowledge, India is No.1 in the underweight population.

We need to rethink our premises. India, reportedly, is now in the top five bracket in obesity. Visceral fat afflicts the young and the old. 

I took a nutritional health check to investigate. It was a rude shock to discover that my body fat content  now exceeds the muscle mass! I joined the wellness industry immediately to restore equilibrium!

Elder sister was incensed when I offered her a free nutritional health assessment. Aren’t you a physiologist, she demanded, how do you get duped by such skulduggery? Don’t you know that wellness is only in the mind? I tell you, you’re in for a terrible let-down!

I do have a few academic degrees, so perhaps, I can think for myself. Fact is our habits have become sedentary. Culturally popular foods stimulate our taste-buds, but their regular intake doesn’t help our waistline. Their nutritional values may be compromised.

The assessment is a good indicator of our current state of health. The knowledge helps us make informed decisions. What we do about our lifestyles thereafter is entirely our own choice.

I continued my explorations of this micro-nutrition business. I did feel a difference in a few weeks. There was 1% decrease in my body fat and, concomitantly, 0.3% increase in my muscle content. 

Elder sister would need to perceive pretty obvious results to calm down. Hopefully, we shall get there - to wellness in body and mind.

Generational break

Brexit has sent shockwaves around the world! In this vote to embrace change, the outpouring of angst is from the young people. After four decades of same old, same old, one might have expected them to welcome change. But no, the older age groups dream of new reality outside of the EU!

Millennials have taken to the streets in protest. Bucketfuls of ketchup underscore the verdict as a "bloody joke"! This generation thrives in Diversity, and on foreign soil. Now they face uncertainties. They perceive the country turning inwards culturally. The outrage is at its becoming isolationist. They fear their world shrinking down to one small island. 

Baby Boomers spearheaded the concept of globalization some decades ago. Then they advocated open borders - but for business purposes. The migration of other nationalities into their world was perhaps never considered. Now they fear cultural invasions, and Brexit presents opportunity to reclaim their distinct national identity.

The two generations, once close because of globalization, now plant in opposing camps. The bonhomie is lost. Bitter political rhetoric stokes differing views of the concept to ignite the fears for the future.

In a tv discussion after the referendum, the hostility was apparent. While a young millennial guest spoke her piece, an older fellow guest repeatedly interrupted her flow to question her stand. Clearly incensed, she vented that, as the privileged white male whose generation had already taken away their future, he now wanted to also take away her airtime! 

From across the world, it appears as if the advocates of the change did not themselves believe in Brexit actually coming to pass. Now that they have it, there is backpedaling on claims. Most importantly, they seem at a loss for plans to consolidate and take forward the change.

Consequences to the verdict, however, were immediate. Many that had voted swayed by emotions, regret the outcome.The markets fell. The currency value reached its lowest in three decades. Investors grew jittery. Some trading had to be suspended. Scotland wants independence. EU leaders adopt a hard line. And then at Euro 2016, England falls to shock defeat against tiny Iceland...